Wednesday, July 02, 2014
Deliver my heart. Please.
Soooo... it's a busy time in the Land of Current Events. Boehner is suing the president. The Supreme Court has been deconstructing collective bargaining rights for public employees. The opinion in Hobby Lobby may or may not be a disaster, depending on who’s talking. Meanwhile, Ann Coulter and others are amusing themselves by debating which sport is morally superior, football or futbol, while lots of people take her way, way too seriously.
Oh, and I think the US lost that soccer thing that's happening.
You know what? I just don't give a shit right now about any of it. And do you know why?
I’ll tell you why:
Last night I ordered my groceries online and they were delivered today. To my door! Like, as in, the nice lady carried the groceries into my house and everything. I have eggs and apples and oranges and cola and carrots and yogurt and frozen meals and stuff.
I haven't been this happy since Webvan went out of business. God, I loved Webvan.
But now? Instacart! Oh, yeah, baby! Fuck, yes!
The secret to happiness is getting your priorities straight. And oh, I haz happiness.